My mom and stepdad retired quite comfortably after what seemed like a mad dash of savings in the last decade of their working careers. Nonetheless, one of my stepdad's retirement hobbies seems to be lying awake at night worrying about the financial straights that I and my syblings are likely to find ourselves in when we're their age. Then he emails it to us so we too can lie awake nights worrying about it to. I thought I'd share his recent insights with the rest of you, to spread the joy:

An interesting article the NYT by Hal Varian. He points out that for the next ten years the deficit will be on the operational side of the USG.

Currently the guv is spending in excess of $5.4 trillion but because there is a surplus in the retirement programs ie Social Sec, Medicare, etc. The current deficit calculated by the Bushies is "only" $1.9 trillion.

After 2012 the retirement funds at the current rate will no longer be surpluses but gradually become deficits. In your lifetimes the SS, Medicare and Medicaid will grow from about 9% of the GDP to approaching 21% by 2075.

If there is a lack of political will to address some of the problems now or in the next few years the easy way out is for the Government to print more money. This will translate into incredible inflation rates and if you do not have your money in real estate, stocks or bonds or some vehicle that will keep pace with inflation you will all be in a not good financial state even if you are currrently sitting on a few thou.

The last para: "All a president needs is a pliable Federal Reserve Board, and this can probably be arranged sometime in tthe next 10 to 15 years. Inflating away the debt is not pretty, but it may well end up being the most politically expedient solution to the burden of accumulated deficits."

There are times like this when I wonder why I bother telling you these things.

W

I only saw few minutes of the Grammies last night, but I'll tell you this: Nora Jones's album, for which she won five Grammies, isn't very good.

I heard her on Letterman or SNL a few months ago and liked her hit song, "Don't Know Why," enough that I bought the album. I've played it at most 4-5 times though. It's really quite dull and forgetable, aside from that one rather catchy tune. Why everyone has gone so gaga for it is beyond me. As far as chick singer/songwriter stuff, Adi recently unearthed the Natalie Merchant album I bought for her more than a year ago, Motherland, which we both now listen to constantly. No comparison how much better Merchant's album is.

On Entertainment Tonight, the reporter referred to Jones as a "jazz singer." Give me a break! Patricia Barber, now there's a jazz singer/songerwriter/pianist.

Eminem was robbed.

This is amusing, from Adam Felber's blog, Fanatical Apathy, who is a frequent guest on NPR's "Wait Wait Don't Tell Me."

• Toys ‘R’ Us roof collapses
• Oil Barge Blast in Staten Island Leaves 2 Dead
• 96 Dead in Fire Ignited at Rhode Island Club
• Chicago stampede kills 21
• About 120 Dead in South Korea Subway Fire

It's a scary world without even going to war. If I were an Al Quaeda bigwig (and lest any FBI agent Googles this, I'm not an Al Quaeda agent), I'd start taking credit for some of this, just to ramp up anxiety. I wonder whether the media has been getting calls like that.

No, that's not a spam headline or a new personal best but the depth of snow in Central Park this morning. It's now 1pm and I can't see the projects accross the intersection out my office window for the wall of snow. Dad's flight was canceled, as predicted. He's now in redial hell trying to get through to Malev, the Hungarian airlines, which is constantly busy (figures). We may be in for two feet yet.

Oh, gag me with a spoon! I've created a monster.

When my step-brother came to town recently, I introduced him to Elizabeth and her friend who prefers to go online as Here I Type. Yes, everyone concerned is a blogger. So I notice that Here I Type and Elizabeth thought Jay was funny, but little did I know. When I visited Jay in Chicago a couple of weeks later, he said, "Do you think [Here I Type] likes me?" Turns out, they'd been exchanging a lot of email. Later, Here I Type sends me emails asking whether I thought he had a crush on her. I'm like, whatever. So I ask Elizabeth if she knows, and she says of course, she's been following it on their blogs. (Sorry, I've been busy.)

But this is a bit much. I just checked into Jay's site to find a goopy Valentine's banner on his blog:

Sheesh.

To all my friends and relatives in Arizona and the West Coast, I just thought you'd enjoy the news that tonight, even with the heater on high in my little home office room, it's still three-sweather weather. Snow started dumping here in Harlem around 9pm and it's not supposed to let up till sometime midday tomorrow. Dad is visiting and is supposed to fly home to Hungary tomorrow. Not looking good...

UPDATE:
Holy shit! NY1 reports:

The snow is falling fast in New York City and won’t let up until Monday night, piling as high as two feet before the skies clear.

According to NY1 meteorologist John Davitt’s latest forecast, the snow will fall steadily overnight, with six to 10 inches on the ground by daybreak. Most of the accumulation will come during the day Monday, accompanied by 40 mph wind gusts and whiteout conditions. The blizzard will dump a total of 10 to 15 inches of snow before it tapers off around midnight, with as much as two feet in some isolated areas.

I suppose this has been around forever and I'm a moron to have just discovered it, but for any of you who have not yet seen WhiteHouse.org, it is utterly brilliant parody.

The Wall Street Journal reports (subscription required):

Might semen have antidepressive effects? Psychologists at the State University of New York in Albany, led by Gordon Gallup, have now analyzed responses from 1,000 female college students on a standard 20-question index of depression. Those who did not use condoms had significantly fewer symptoms of depression than did women who had protected sex, they report.

Pablo Montoya offers "Unwrap that rascal."

Forget about Navy Seals, the Navy is now using sea lions to defend itself against attack in the Persian Gulf. Those poor Iraqi bastards don't stand a chance.

(Via Mark)

I saw the new Spike Lee joint 25th Hour a couple of weeks ago with Elizabeth. I was blown away. It was by far the best movie I saw from 2002 (granted, I am way behind on my wish list and still haven't seen such promising works as About Schmidt, The Hours or Adaptation). I mentioned how good it was to a friend in LA on a recent trip and he and his wife were surprised I liked it, as they heard it sucked. Then I said I had loved Lee's previous film, Summer of Sam. Again, serious suprise, as they had heard that film really sucked.

Huh.

I'd love to hear what anyone else thought. I wept copiously in the theater. Fantastic acting, beautiful cinematography, gripping plot (or situation, anyway), masterly directing, in my opinion. Why no wiff of it at the Golden Globes or the Academy Awards really surprises me.

Props to Miki for finding this. Funny. Scary.

Mark, with nothing better to do with his time, points out this photo from Bathroom-Mania.com

From Dork Zygotian:

FROM: GEORGE WALKER BUSH

DEAR SIR / MADAM,

I AM GEORGE WALKER BUSH, SON OF THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA GEORGE HERBERT WALKER BUSH, AND CURRENTLY SERVING AS PRESIDENT OF THE UNITES STATES OF AMERICA. THIS LETTER MIGHT SURPRISE YOU BECAUSE WE HAVE NOT MET NEITHER IN PERSON NOR BY CORRESPONDENCE.

I CAME TO KNOW OF YOU IN MY SEARCH FOR A RELIABLE AND REPUTABLE PERSON TO HANDLE A VERY CONFIDENTIAL BUSINESS TRANSACTION, WHICH INVOLVES THE TRANSFER OF A HUGE SUM OF MONEY TO AN ACCOUNT REQUIRING MAXIMUM CONFIDENCE.

I AM WRITING YOU IN ABSOLUTE CONFIDENCE PRIMARILY TO SEEK YOUR ASSISTANCE IN ACQUIRING OIL FUNDS THAT ARE PRESENTLY TRAPPED IN THE REPUBLIC OF IRAQ.

MY PARTNERS AND I SOLICIT YOUR ASSISTANCE IN COMPLETING A TRANSACTION BEGUN BY MY FATHER, WHO HAS LONG BEEN ACTIVELY ENGAGED IN THE EXTRACTION OF PETROLEUM IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AND BRAVELY SERVED HIS COUNTRY AS DIRECTOR OF THE UNITED STATES CENTRAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY.

IN THE DECADE OF THE NINETEEN-EIGHTIES, MY FATHER, THEN VICE-PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, SOUGHT TO WORK WITH THE GOOD OFFICES OF THE PRESIDENT OF THE REPUBLIC OF IRAQ TO REGAIN LOST OIL REVENUE SOURCES IN THE NEIGHBORING ISLAMIC REPUBLIC OF IRAN.

THIS UNSUCCESSFUL VENTURE WAS SOON FOLLOWED BY A FALLING OUT WITH HIS IRAQI PARTNER, WHO SOUGHT TO ACQUIRE ADDITIONAL OIL REVENUE SOURCES IN THE NEIGHBORING EMIRATE OF KUWAIT, A WHOLLY-OWNED U.S.-BRITISH SUBSIDIARY.

MY FATHER RE-SECURED THE PETROLEUM ASSETS OF KUWAIT IN 1991 AT A COST OF SIXTY-ONE BILLION U.S. DOLLARS ($61,000,000,000).

OUT OF THAT COST, THIRTY-SIX BILLION DOLLARS ($36,000,000,000) WERE SUPPLIED BY HIS PARTNERS IN THE KINGDOM OF SAUDI ARABIA AND OTHER PERSIAN GULF MONARCHIES, AND SIXTEEN BILLION DOLLARS ($16,000,000,000) BY GERMAN AND JAPANESE PARTNERS.

BUT MY FATHER'S FORMER IRAQI BUSINESS PARTNER REMAINED IN CONTROL OF THE REPUBLIC OF IRAQ AND ITS PETROLEUM RESERVES.

MY FAMILY IS CALLING FOR YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE IN FUNDING THE REMOVAL OF THE PRESIDENT OF THE REPUBLIC OF IRAQ AND ACQUIRING THE PETROLEUM ASSETS OF HIS COUNTRY, AS COMPENSATION FOR THE COSTS OF REMOVING HIM FROM POWER.

UNFORTUNATELY, OUR PARTNERS FROM 1991 ARE NOT WILLING TO SHOULDER THE BURDEN OF THIS NEW VENTURE, WHICH IN ITS UPCOMING PHASE MAY COST THE SUM OF 100 BILLION TO 200 BILLION DOLLARS ($100,000,000,000 - $200,000,000,000), BOTH IN THE INITIAL ACQUISITION AND IN LONG-TERM MANAGEMENT....

I WOULD BESEECH YOU TO TRANSFER A SUM EQUALING TEN TO TWENTY-FIVE PERCENT (10-25 %) OF YOUR YEARLY INCOME TO OUR ACCOUNT TO AID IN THIS IMPORTANT VENTURE. THE INTERNAL REVENUE SERVICE OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA WILL FUNCTION AS OUR TRUSTED INTERMEDIARY.

I PROPOSE THAT YOU MAKE THIS TRANSFER BEFORE THE FIFTEENTH (15TH) OF THE MONTH OF APRIL.

I KNOW THAT A TRANSACTION OF THIS MAGNITUDE WOULD MAKE ANYONE APPREHENSIVE AND WORRIED. BUT I AM ASSURING YOU THAT ALL WILL BE WELL AT THE END OF THE DAY. A BOLD STEP TAKEN SHALL NOT BE REGRETTED, I ASSURE YOU.

PLEASE DO BE INFORMED THAT THIS BUSINESS TRANSACTION IS 100% LEGAL. IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO CO-OPERATE IN THIS TRANSACTION, PLEASE CONTACT OUR INTERMEDIARY REPRESENTATIVES TO FURTHER DISCUSS THE MATTER.

I PRAY THAT YOU UNDERSTAND OUR PLIGHT. MY FAMILY AND OUR COLLEAGUES WILL BE FOREVER GRATEFUL. PLEASE REPLY IN STRICT CONFIDENCE TO THE CONTACT NUMBERS BELOW.

SINCERELY WITH WARM REGARDS,

GEORGE WALKER BUSH

Not sure if it's a Dork original or not.

UPDATE:
Dork writes back to say no, it's not his composition, that he found it on Metafilter. He adds "Bush rules!" tho I think he was speaking literally, not expressing an opinion.

Back in July, I wrote about how Bush had twice in one sound bite used the non-word "malfeance" when he meant to say "malfeasance," and that I noticed the NY Times corrected him in their quote on the piece without comment. Now I see them glossing over an even bigger blooper I just caught of his the other day.

On January 30th, I heard an NPR report [Real Audio file] in which Bush said "[S]hould [Saddam] choose to leave the country along with a lot of the other henchmen who have tortured the Iranian...Iraqi people, we would welcome that, of course."

Yes, he actually, at this stage in the game, mispoke and said "Iranian" when he meant to say Iraqi, catching the mistake and correcting himself immediately. I mean, what a numbskull. He still confuses Iraq and Iran. Listen to the Real Audio file yourself, there's no mistake. Isn't that worth the public knowing? Isn't that news, dare I suggest, fit to print? Yet, when the NY Times reported on the quote (made at a press briefing), they eliminated the mispeak, writing only "Iraqi," again without a "[sic]" or any other comment (likewise NPR in its online transcript).

Can I get a witness? This is, like, bad journalism, no?

UPDATE:
Henry Copeland, former correspondent for the International Herald Tribune (among other gigs) writes:

Welcome back to blogging.

Re Bush on Iran/q: As I recall, there's some tradition among reporters of quoting Presidents EXACTLY. No cleaning, no sanding, no smudging. Presidential words, after all, have incredible de facto and de jure power; they are, in some quasi religious sense, the utterances of the United States itself. So this would make an important departure.

OK, now that I've written this, I'll post on my blog too.

The chain letter was great too. From Dork? Wow, he REALLY needs a blog. Or you can just channel him and become world-famous for more than your marketing expertise.

Henry

Yeah, getting Dork a place to blog was my 2003 New Year resolution.